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Res.10 |
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無回答 2004/05/14 09:45:43
can’t write in japanese today, so i have no choice other than to write in english, as i,m on the way to learn, please bear with me..... this is the one who wrote this topic. my boyfriend is canadian as well, and in our case, i think i know what the problems are. firstly, he had been abused by his stepfather in his childhood, his own mother knew the fact but didn’t stop her husband, so he still feels that his mother doesn’t love him. he left his home when he was in his early teens and never be back. secondly, his own father was an alcoholic, so is he. these main problems had caused him lots of troubles in his life, and those troubles had made him more insecure, unreliable, dishonest person about eveything....that’s what i guess about him. i had been trying to understand for about a half of a year, with listening to him and reading scycological books. he didn’t even admit that he was an alcoholic, but now, he does. when i wrote this topic for the first time, we seemed to have too many problems to deal with, therefore my mind was soooo messed up all the time. i wasn’t sure what the main problem was, what to do, what i wanted to do becauses i have my own proplem in my past as well. nevertheless, onece i started to try to make my mind clear, and made a first action, i became to be able to see the things more clearly. we started to go to several A.A meetings at churches. now he knows that he really rally needs to solve his problemes by his own, and he’s trying hard, i can see that. fortunetly, we could meet really good people who give us support. things are getting better around us, as we fought a lot, struggled, but never gave up and put the priority on which is the biggest, and forcus it. i don,t know if it’s something to do with his nationality or not. i would say that’s all depends, you know. however, as long as someone has some problem socialy, he/she must has a problem in his/her past that is based on, i think. and also, i believe that as long as you seek help to others, there are lots of systems and people that can help you in canada. in conclusion, the first thing that you should do is, find out what his problem is. in order that, therapy must be helpful, i think. thanks for giving your coment on my topic.
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