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No.2058
Help...
by Xin from 無回答 2004/03/04 04:24:20

My girlfriend is a Japanese, we are together about 2 years, but after she came back from Japan at last month, our relationship has changed. now, we promised that we won’t meet each other in 3 month, but I really wanna be with her. What should I do? I’m not a japanese, what should I do? Please! Need anyone’s help. Please! Thank you so much!

Res.1 by ai from カナダ 2004/03/04 06:52:55

I think you better talk to her more. She might had something in Japan when she went back Japan last time. It is really hard to accept that your relationship has changed but if you still love her, you have to do somthing to change your relationsip to get back her heart.
I have boyfriend and we’ve been together almost 3 years, but this month I’m going back Japan to make sure my feeling. it is not the easiest thing to be in a different country for us lest of our life. (in general) It is the huge huge decision. I have worry that my boyfriend really understand about those things or not. I want him to understand my situation and feeling that’s why I’m going back. After I left I wanna know how he is gonna be. If he has strong love to me and show me to be determind to support me, I might come back.
I don’t know anything about you and your girlfriend’s relationship but I want you to know how hard to be in the different country and look back your own if you were the good listner of her.
Good luck
 
Res.2 by Xin from 無回答 2004/03/04 15:39:05

Thank you so much. In my situation, I think she left me because of my behaviour, she said that she doesn’t wanna stand of that anymore, but I don’ know why shs could be with me for years. If she really doesn’t like my behaiour, we should break up much earlier, but why we got the problem after she went back to Japan? I don’t understand. Even though she went to Japan for 8 months, I wasn’t attracted by anynor, I loved her, and I still love her. She’s the only one who I wanna be with. Could you please tell me how to apologize to her for my behaviour? Thank you.  
Res.3 by Xin from 無回答 2004/03/04 15:41:59

I know that I should solve this problem by myself, but I don’t really know Japanese culture, I don’t know what I have to do that can let her believe me. Please tell me how. Thank you.  
Res.4 by 無回答 from 無回答 2004/03/05 22:45:06

She needs something that you do not have now. if you can figure out what you are missing, then work hard to get it. In that way she might come back to you. If you have no idea about what she wants from you then sorry to say but you guys are over. It will be better for you and her to beak up and find new partner.  
Res.5 by Xin from Vancouver 2004/03/05 22:56:19

Thank u so much. I understood what I have to do finally. U gave me a correct advise. I appreciate it. I’ll try my best to get her back cuz’ I really love her!  
Res.6 by 無回答 from バンクーバー 2004/03/05 23:28:16

You and your GF need to talk more, I guess. While she had lived far away from you, her thinking way might change in some ways.

By the way, where are you from? Are you Korean or Chinese or ...??? Don’t think abuot the period that you guys had been dating. From now, you guys should start again. Japanese girs are nice, right? Good luck!  
Res.7 by Xin from Vancouver 2004/03/06 21:26:06

Thank you. I’m from China, I don’t really know Japanese culture, but I’m sure that she loved me. I really appreciate your adivce, but i’m not sure that she loves me now or not. Even though I wanted to talk with her more, she said that she doesn’t wanna meet me in 3 month, and she want us to think about our relationship more. I think I should keep the promise with her first, then I’ll talk with her after 3 month. Do you think keeping promise is a good idea?
By the way, she’s a nice girl, and her Japanese friends are also nice, I like Japanese people, I’ve enjoyed much good time with them.
Thank you very much.  
Res.8 by 無回答 from バンクーバー 2004/03/06 23:23:01

Hello! As you wrote, keeping promise is a good idea. It’s good that you’ll just wait for her for three months and then will see her. Now she may not be sure about both her feeling to you and your feeling to her. During three months, it’s better not to do special things for her, I think. JUST WAIT! Three months are not so long. Keep loving her even if you can’t see her if you really love her.

From your writing, I feel you are really nice Chinese. Sometimes Chinese boys just wanna play with Japanese girls, but I think your feeling to her is kind of serious. I hope you and your GF will be happy soon.  
Res.9 by TO from トロント 2004/03/07 14:25:15

>I think she left me because of my behaviour, she said that she doesn’t wanna stand of that anymore.

What did you do?? Was it really bad thing? Did it make your girlfriend angry? If you did something that let her lose her trust for you, it might be difficult for you to be dating with her again happily. Trust is difficult to built, but it’s easy to break...If you really wanna date with your girlfriend seriously, you should show your seriousness to her.  
Res.10 by Xin from Vancouver 2004/03/09 17:11:27

Thank you for your supporting. Three months isn’t long at all, I strongly look forward to date with her again. I really don’t wanna lose our love cuz’ we’ve engaged. I think there’s no difference of love between different countries. Even though we don’t speak same language, we don’t have same culture, or whatever , Just we love each other, that’s good enough for us.
You are so kind and nice, even though I don’tknow who you are, I’ll still say ”thank you very much and God bless you”.  
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